Monday, March 09, 2009

Re-emerging

I feel as if I'm slowly regaining my life.

The past couple of months have been pretty bleak & black for me. The famous black dog bit me by the ankle & wouldn't shift however hard I tried. I found it really hard being out of work & even worse signing on to claim my meagre £61 a week of benefits. I've realised now that I was terrified at the thought of being out of work for a long time. Every day on the news are stories of more companies going under, the unemployment figures rising daily and I knew that it would be harder to find a job than in normal conditions. Also the guilt of not contributing to the family was eating me up inside. DH didn't put any pressure on me at all it was all from me but I can be my own worst enemy.

But I'm on my way out now as I've found myself another job A job was created for me in a company just over a mile away from home by someone that I've worked with before. The team are fantastic and for the first time ever the office is full of adults just getting on with their jobs. There is no atmosphere, no 'big boss' throwing their weight around and everyone is happy to be there. It's a welcome change from bullying bosses and the loneliness of being in a dark cold house by myself all day.

However my body isn't used to it yet. 6:30 starts to give the dogs a 3 mile walk before I leave the house & working a 5 day week left me shattered last week but I'll get over that soon.

Knitting hasn't really featured much over the last month as it's something I do when I'm happy. Once I shake the tiredness I'm sure I'll be back to it.

5 comments:

Cybèle said...

Glad to see you posting again and back in work. How are the dogs coping with you being away so much more?
Know all about office atmosphere. Scary how much energy office tactics take up...

Arianwen said...

congratulations again about the job.Look forward to seeing what you cast on next!

RooKnits said...

Oh I am so glad things are looking up for you. Sometimes we are our own worst enemy.

blog-blethers said...

I'm so glad things are beginning to look more positive again ... even if it does mean walking the dogs in what seems like the middle of the night to me!!

And hopefully you'll soon feel ready to getting back to the needles again, stashing, numerous WIPs...

Daisy said...

Congratulations about the job & good luck with everything. I hope you get into it all soon.