Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Festive misery

Ever since DD was born we've worked hard every year to ensure that her Christmas experience was fantastic. As a young child she saw snowy footprints from the fire place, left mince pies & carrots out for Father Christmas & his reindeers & always found a big pile of presents under the tree.

However she has done it again; just like Mothers Day she single handedly managed to ruin our Christmas Day. It was horrendous & I haven't had a worse Christmas since I was a child.

I've decided to ask her school for help as we're obviously doing something wrong & need an outsider to step in. So next year things will be very different.

8 comments:

Tigers said...

I feel for you. I have the same monster at my house.

She is 10 years old and everything is an argument, from go and put some shoes on, to, do you need a jacket?!! Since the time she could talk, no let up.

Every single day is a struggle with her. And like your daughter at school she is wonderful, polite, uses her manners etc. I am the one to cop her answering back and the indignant hmmmphs.
My Husband had enough of our fighting and actually left us! Nevermind about helping me with her.
Makes me wonder why I had a child sometimes.

I work in a special class, with children with behaviour problems too and I can handle them no problem - they will listen to me, but my own is very different.

They do say that the behaviour is because she feels most comfortable with you but...it is no compensation is it?

Good luck.

Cybèle said...

If you ever feel the need to vent, please feel free to mail me. I have a 16 year old 'stepdaughter' to deal with, who managed to whinge, moan and whine her way through my birthday evening with my partner recently. Fortunately she was alright on Christmas Day, but I did make it clear to my partner her behaviour had rather upset me and that I'd found it inexcusable.
Just wanted to wish you good luck and to let you know I'm sympathising with you!

Woollywarbler said...

Oh dear, whatever did she do? I'm really sorry that you had such a grotty Christmas. Does she know what she did and feeling the slightest bit sorry or still at the butter wouldn't melt and I don't know/care what you mean stage? Sometimes children haven't got a clue how badly something affects their poor parents. I hope you manage to sort it and that things are a little better right now. Sending a virtual hug anyway x

susoolu said...

Oh, pants, double pants, with pooh-pants on top.

Hope at least some moments were fun - watching Ginny & Lyra playing with the wrapping, perhaps?

Teenagers can be absolutely awful.... sorry.

Anonymous said...

Poor you, sorry. My DD is 26 now, still has tantrums and makes unreasonable demands, usually upheld by her father who can see no wrong in any of her behaviour....at least she lives away from home now, and somehow the younger siblings have been quite delightful MOST of the time! My feeling is that you have to continue to be very firm, to let her know the boundaries and enforce them constantly...not easy when you are continually undermined by the other 'adult' in control...My daughter has gone from being the teen from Hell and testing and challenging every possible rule to being a medal winning sargeant in the police, Nobody is more surprised than me! Good luck, I'm with you! Fran

Alison said...

I feel for you! My DD wasworse than BOTH my boys combined! However she is now 23 and has a 2 year old daughter. When she was pregnant she was adamant she only wanted a boy. I told her she deserved a daughter to be to her the delight she's been to me (take that how you want!!)Mine started at about 13 but decided to leave home at 16. A blessed relief but a worry. I found the boys not as mouthy but I put that down to boys not feeling the need as much to stamp out an identity of their own. I promise you it will get better, and just spare a thought for my friend who has 5 girls, 22 to 10, no boys and no man will stay with her because each kid plays up in turn!

Cinders said...

You ave my sympathy! My 11 years old son is exactly the same. When you've worked yourself up and made something special they manage to ruin it . he spoiled our xmas eve party by being awful to next doors 6 year old to the point where I thought we were all going to fall out. I made him write an apology the next day aND POST IT THROUGH . He's grounded again as we found the missing cigarettes that he stole from M-I-L!! Grit your teeth and keep ploughing on. You're not bad parents. its her age.

Patricia said...

I had to chuckle and then sigh after reading your posts and the accompanying comments. Makes one wish that one stayed with cats as pets.
I, too, have a 16 year old son who feels that the universe revolves around him. this seems to be a societal issue that affects so many parents.
I have eschewed quite a few of the material things that most kids have. He just received his first mobile at 16. He has a part time job at a local bakery and has purchased the things that I have refused (video games systems) to buy with his own funds.
The job has helped quite a bit. He has to work along side of his peers and cannot slack his duties.
I have daily chores for him to perform. He washes our vehicles and has started to do his own laundry.
I remind him that he is almost grown and cannot expect hotelier type services from his parents.
I find that standing very firm is the key. I hope that you are able to keep it together. My heart is with you!